Friday, January 28, 2005

living in harmony.

It's only Bartok. That guy below oughta be glad he's not in my shoes. I have to put up with the sweet soothing strains of my neighbour's banghra music at 2am everyday.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Dido and Aeneas: "a lesbian opera"???

Record: I was an hour early for my first history lecture 'Opera and Reason' last Monday. [Insert applause here]

So. During the lecture, we had to discuss in groups of four about this article written by Judith A. Peraino - "I Am an Opera: Identifying with Purcell's Dido and Aeneas", from the book "En Travesti: Women, Gender Subversion, Opera".

From the start of her paper, Judith had already proclaimed herself to be a "lesbian musicologist".

Me: "Uhhhhhh. Right. What's this got to do with the opera?" Cass, who'd already read the article, highlighted a few excerpts to us, some of which can be found below:

"... I will offer a 'rebellious' reading of Dido and Aeneas showing how the very ambiguities and flaws that trouble male musicologists provide access for present-day lesbian audiences by inviting cathartic identification with either Dido or the Sorceress.

I've nothing against her homosexuality. I don't care. Just as long as she writes well and has something meaningful to say. But she comes across as almost pompous and self-righteous when she shoves her 'queerness' into the reader's face:

"...and using the notions of cathartic identifications and vicarious pleasure.. I will project backward (using my lesbian hindsight) in order to reconfigure history from the perspective of the margins.

Still following? There's more:

"My experience as a lesbian has no doubt created a sensibility that counsels my taste in music and scholarly pursuits.

"...[In this article]..I have been able to bring together my identites as a lesbian and a musicologist through a particular work of art."

Yes, yes, we got the point. Enough with that already. What about the opera?!

Basically, Purcell wrote this for a girls boarding school around 1770. Instead of interpreting it as a good ol' traditional story of unfulfilled love (Aeneas leaves Queen Dido to conquer Italy instigated by Sorceress, Dido commits suicide), Judith apparently sees tons of lesbian references and connotations hidden in the opera. Simply because it was written for a girls boarding school:

"..could not the role of both Dido and the Sorceress have provided a cathartic experience[she loves this word, doesn't she.] for young women at the boarding school? I can only imagine that growing pains and competition...setting off indulgences in masochistic self-pity or sadistic cruelty with little provocation."

"..the opera with two heroines [Dido and Sorceress] allows for the 'working out' of the underlying homosexual dynamics at play in the homosocial environment of the boarding school."

We were rolling in fits of laughter by then. Masochistic indeed! You know, I spent nearly half my life in all-girl schools, and I don't remember much hanky-panky between girls going on. I'm not saying there wasn't, but it was all rather mild. Just your usual innocuous puppy 'crushes' on your female seniors/teachers. Nothing serious, really. But even if there was, it was certainly not rampant. And no, I did NOT have any of those crushes whatsoever.

Besides, most adolescent girls are usually sunk up to their eyebrows with fanciful notions of love and their one and only 'prince charming'. If YOU were the composer writing an opera to be put up for nubile young girls, why the hell would you compose a lesbian-themed opera?

We agreed that this Judith person was trying to convince Society (and herself) that it's okay to be Other, an Outsider, a lesbian. She's just projecting her suppressed(?) boarding school fantasies, uniform-role-play fetishes and what not onto poor Purcell's creation.

That aside, she made this statement which I h.a.v.e. to quote regarding the unusual short length of the opera:

"I cannot resist the temptation to regard the appreciation of length as a masculine aesthetic."

Ha.

We never got to the end of the article, as we figured it was probably just embellishments on the sentence "I Am a Lesbian, I'm proud of it and to hell with the opera.". We're cool with that, we've nothing against homosexuals. Good for her.

Me: "Who on earth is this Judith? She's mental."

Cass: "Well, we definitely know she's a lesbian."

Julia: "Actually, I'm surprised her article was even published. It's clearly one-sided."

Dave: "Yeah, I wonder who published this..."

We turned to the front page and looked at the reference: New York, Columbia Uni Press, 1995.

Then it dawned upon us: "No wonder she's batty."

"She's American!"

Monday, January 24, 2005

'depressing', not 'sentimental'.

Just read one of Paul Verlaine's poems:Colloque Sentimental, taken from the set Fetes Galants.

This is the English translation of it:

Sentimental Conversation.

In the old lonely park's frozen glass

two dark shadows lately passed.

Their lips were slack, their eyes were blurred,

the words they spoke were scarcely heard.

In the old lonely park's frozen glass

two spectral forms invoked the past.

'Do you remember our former ecstasies?'

'Why would you have me rake up memories?'

'Does your heart still beat at my name alone?'

'Is it always my soul you see in dream?' - 'Ah, no'.

'Oh the lovely days of unspeakable mystery,

when our mouths met!' - 'Ah yes, maybe.'

'How blue it was, the sky, how high our hopes!'

'Hope fled, conquered, along the dark slopes.'

So they walked there, among the wild herbs,

and the night alone listened to their words."

Debussy's setting of this poem is gorgeously mournful. Poignant, an underlying air of resignation, and not too cloying.

This poem is not only depressing, but frightening.

For it is far too realistic for comfort.

So give me my fantasy books with their make-believe happy endings, and away with anything real-life, thank you very much.

Saturday, January 22, 2005

I told you so.

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

bloody fire alarm.

Just when I was having a proper sleep after essay hell.

Enough said.

So I finished a whole new box of cereal (the big box) and two bars of green and black's white chocolate (also the big-sized ones).

I look down south. The view of my big clumpy feet is obscured by an arching mound of pale-soft-squishy flesh, rising from my waist.

Hang on, where's my waist?

I think I finally understand the term 'fusion' in all sense of the word.

I wish I could do a Harry Potter (maybe Hermoine, she's pretty and she's better at spellcraft), wiggle my wand, and swop the size of my belly and boobs. Not only will I have a concave tummy, I'd have a C cupsize to boot. Won't that be wicked.

Anyway. Dinner conversation was centred on this week's latest inflammatory topic, started by dear Marcus: "Do We Have a Right to Pornography?"

The general consensus is a resounding yes, it should be up to the individual to decide for themselves if they want to watch it. But child pornography is a no-no. Paedophiles should NOT be indulged. That's just wrong, innit? Then again, so is beastiality. So are many, many other things for that matter.

In my groggy state, I can't remember who said what word-for-word, so I took the liberty to rephrase bits and pieces. Here are a few random and controversial (some irrelevant) soundbites from dinner:

It's now up to you guys to ferret out the truth from the lies. Just normal comments, really. But it's still fun to record them down for sake of posterity.

Oh, the heady sensation of freedom after the shackles of essay-hell have been broken...!

Till tomorrow anyway. Shucks.

Friday, January 14, 2005

Harry the Nazi: a defence of the idiot prince

"Prince Harry is sensationally stupid. Seriously, the lad is practically retarded, so its appropriate to cut him some slack. Its a small miracle every time he finds his mouth with his cigarette, so the fact that he would put on a Nazi armband and not think - at any point - that this might possibly be a really really wrong thing to do, is perfectly understandable. Questions must be asked of the people around him: his friends, his careers, his bodyguards. Did no one think to mention to the dribbling moron that maybe the pretty red armband with the funny black squiggle in the middle was maybe best left in the limo? Would you blame a coma victim for wetting the bed? No. So dont be too harsh on Harry."

Excerpt taken from London News Review.

pressing on.

Exams and essays bring out the worst in me. Weight at its highest peak, the opposite for my skin, and I get very irritable, greedy, moody and whiny.

And whine I shall.

I wish I had sponge-like properties. Then I can soak up information easily. And eat as much as I want without expanding too much sideways.

My grocery bills these past weeks have been painfully exorbitant. So was today's exam.

The price of procrastination was too high this time round, possibly at the expense of my degree.

Re-learning my lesson once more.

Too late, too late.

And far beyond reprieve.

Sidedish: To listen is an effort, and just to hear is no merit. A duck hears also. -Stravinsky

When was the last time YOU really listened to anyone?

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

a number of things.

1. I'm sorry to say that I'm actually adhering to my New Year resolutions.

2. I woke up at 930am today.

3. And got back my internet connection.

4. Despite waking up a number of times last night, I finally had the best sleep ever for the past fortnight.

5. Thank you Sunsun, owe you 1001 favours, love you loads!

6. I think I'm going to fail my Debussy paper on Thursday.

7. I haven't practised piano since Christmas break started.

8. I'm hungry.

9. I don't understand what I'm attempting to read.

10. Why do wet clothes stick to your skin? I forgot.

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

spank me...

... for I've been a naughty, naughty girl.

I oughta be studying for my exams but here I am, blogging, surfing online, and pottering around in my room. I even had time to swing by Marcus's room where Roger tried to teach me Speed (failed attempt), watched Ali G with Vincent, snacked on cereal and chocolate...

At least I revised one chapter on Pelleas et Melisande. Ah well. Better than nothing.

Random thought: The manager of Chelsea is such an obnoxious mingin' wanker.

Monday, January 03, 2005

new year resolutions.

Everyone knows that New Year resolutions are made to be broken. So here's my list of New Year resolutions I promise I'd break:

1. I will eat junk food everyday.

2. I will practise piano only twice a week.

3. I will take my own sweet time to return my library books.

4. I will waste money by buying dinner take-outs instead of eating in at the halls.

5. I will only start on my essays 48hours before the deadline.

6. I will continue to buy one CD per week.

7. I will always endeavour to arrive 20 min late for all occasions, including classes and outings.

8. I will always leave my laptop running for 24/7, 365 days a year.

9. I will eat at least 2 pkts of korean cup noodles everyday.

10. I swear I will be become the meanest evil witch alive. Ho ho ho.

Wow, I think I made a really good list of resolutions that I can actually break, and therefore keep. Ooh hang on, I left out one:

11. I will never step into the gym! *winks*

Disclaimer: Just in case, I said 'step into the gym'. I didn't mention anything abt working out..

blueprint

I will like to spend my days, as though they are my own, which I mostly end up doing in halves, for duty beckons, and I am answering its clarion call. Soon enough! I am also a veteran procrastinator.

fresh monodies

Old wounds hurt most, I learned this today, becaus...
She speaks, repeating the old litanies, of worn ac...
time skips
and it all comes together!
beethoven's symphony no.7 2nd mvt
again,
towards that something
In the alley of shadows and death
Masking Tape
another end of the world

previous rants

August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
November 2010
January 2011
February 2011
August 2011
October 2011
May 2013

treatises on life

arty jen
betty boop
carmentica
charming-linn
chasing snowy cars
cheeky lynn
cheryliciously glam
clean and cute
cyclist-mad bass
darling dominic
feisty jing
fellow ditz-sista/porkSTAR
hail mary!
hell's kitchen
hero on the beach
h-Euge heart
hunky lenny
lipgloss queen
little cheryl
live n learn, baby
lolita lou
loony loon
mr popular
musically dan
m y s t j
phringe
princess tania
roger smurf
runaway pigeon
sabotage king jeremiah
sibling angst1
sibling angst2
spector dan
spunky tian
steffy bunny
sun-sunzzz
teeny wee-nee
weeeee, leonard!
yangtze yang'en

frivolous pursuits

for shallow ppl
for very geeky ppl
for the truly bored
spun prose
binary thoughts
past imprints
some stamps
montage of images
other memories

mulling over

And there were phlegmatic souls.